You found faith, then faith found me
People seek meaning and comfort in something greater than themselves. I think this is a part of our human nature. We need guidance, we need meaning, but don't know where to get it from. Self-guidance isn't enough, it can often lead to a different form of worship absent from God.
A firm belief in No-God leads people to "worship" in other ways. In endless forms, like the worship of self, other people, status, travel, entertainment, drugs, food, sex, work, success, money, possessions, politics, gurus, science or tech.
For the majority of us non-believers, this is the case. Without God, something else fills its place. It takes an extremely disciplined person to not allow temptations to steer him in a destructive direction.
I believe that the meaning of life is that there is no meaning. You get to decide the meaning, which is beautiful and scary at the same time. That gives one person a tremendous amount of responsibility.
Life's an empty canvas, and you hold a paint brush. But that paint brush can easily turn into a knife or a torch if you're not careful.
The confident proclamation that God does not exist is a religion in itself. It's now become a different form of faith, a belief that God is not real. The downsides of this, of course, are obvious. That person invents his own moral basis, which means it can be fluid, and change to fit his every desire.
So when this fails, and he feels bad in the choices he's made, he looks to his friends and family. Maybe they can provide him some moral guidance.
It becomes clear then that the people in his life with the strongest resilience, a firm moral base, the most confidence and happiness and humility, these people believe in God. They have a personal relationship with God. They lean into their faith when they feel helpless or confused. This provides them relief and comfort, the guidance that every flawed human needs. It makes them a better person.
I know all this, because I've been that guy. That was me, once a believer, then a doubter. I never firmly stood ground saying "God is not real, and I'm positive about that." I never worshiped in the church of No-God. But I was knocking on that door.
I've always been religion-curious, but for many years I did not believe and I did not try to believe.
I'm so thankful that we both have such strong believers in our families. It's clear we were raised to be good people, and we've done our best to meet their expectations. I've wandered away from God much more than you, but your presence in my life has brought me close to God again. At least I'm trying to find that closeness, and every day I think about it now.
My parents are the best people I know. I feel so lucky that I can say that. And you are the best person I know who is my peer, my age, my generation. I feel even luckier that you love me despite my shaky faith and funky past.
All of the many things I've spent years learning about, all the self development and philosophy and psychology I've read, the self-help books that clutter my Kindle, you understand it all without reading any of that stuff. Your family provided a path, you followed along, studied scripture, and your faith made you the amazing woman you are today.
It all starts and ends with your faith. The more I've gotten to know you, I see how it guides your life in every which way. It's my favorite thing about you, which is why I'm writing about this first. It makes you, you.
I love to nerd out about personal philosophy, and believe that it's healthy to question norms. But maybe to simply live like Jesus would want me to checks all those boxes too. I'm learning this now.
You accepting me for who I am is all I need to know how to live a great life. So long as you continue to embrace me, then I must be doing a good job. To be a great man is to be loved by a faithful woman who loves Jesus even more.
I love you more than Jesus right now, but maybe I'll get there one day too.